What exactly does that mean anyway?
The scriptures say "...peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes." (D&C 121:7-8)
A small moment? Give me some of that perspective. I understand what we are supposed to do. I understand that our perspective is so much different than the Lord's. I understand that in the grand scheme of things, our lives are a fraction (a small moment). I understand that we are here to learn and grow and to become more like Him. I understand that without trials and opposition, we wouldn't be able to do so.
So, my question is this: How do you "endure it well?" What qualifies enduring well? Being happy about it? Surely that can't be. Just accepting it and moving on? Is that giving up? That's almost what it feels like. Just living life day to day and praying for the strength? It feels like just barely surviving. It doesn't feel like enduring well. Pray for distractions? Those distractions come to an end, and then it's after mid-night. It's quiet. There's nothing to do, really, but listen to thoughts. Then, replay conversations and actions over and over and wonder what can be done to better endure or to be a better, more humble person. What can be done to endure it well?
19 comments:
Such a good thought, especially good that you had it at 1AM and could form real sentences. I don't think Eduring it well means being happy all the time or just giving up I just think it means that you understand what you are supposed to do and that you are doing it to the best of your ability. You understand that God won't give you anything you can't handle and so whatever comes your way you handle it the best way possible and then you keep on keepin on. it's all about trust, that doesn't mean you aren't sad or angry but that you still trust Him.
I have been thinking about this a ton lately - the concept of time. A friend just had a baby with a heart valve problem, they knew it was there at 20 weeks, but wanted to have him anyhow. He was born the night before last and they thought he'd live about 3 hours. I think he actually fought and lived 8 hours, but he still passed away that night. I realize this doesn't resemble your situation at all, but it really had me thinking about time and life spans and crying for their loss. Remember the book "My Turn on Earth"? I read that to my kids the other day and a line stuck out - she said it doesn't matter how long out turn was. That's obviously not doctrine, but it struck me. Anyhow, when it comes to enduring I'd say, cry a lot, try a lot, struggle a ton, but just keep trying. Hold on to your faith and don't give up. That's enduring in my book.
My thoughts and prayers are with you guys! I appreciate being to check your blog for updates. Hang in there!
I have thought alot about this...and I went back to when we were taking discussions at your house. I think it was Elder Fleshmen who said that we choose our lives before we come to earth. Choose and accept our families, and all we will endure on this earth. We accept all these things to return to our Heavenly Father...so with this I have to say that you have a wonderful man who choose YOU as his companion for time and all eternity. He choose this path and all it entails to do a job for Heavenly Father. You are enduring this the best way you can, and Heavenly Father is very proud of you and your family.
When my dad got so sick this helped me to think that he loved me this much to accept the things he was going to go through on this earth. They say that our lives on earth are like a blink of an eye to our savior. No matter what this life brings, its what happens when we return to him that makes this all worth it in the end. Keep living day by day Kristen, and above all else you have tons of people who are here and love you all tons!!
Oh I love you so much. You are enduring it VERY WELL. The key is to never give up. Yes you can cry and yell and feel sorry for your self. Just don't stay there to long. Find some service to do and love, love and more loving.
God loves you and he has blessed you with a wealth of great people in your life. USE US!!!!!!!!!! oxoxoox
Such a good post. I ponder things like that a LOT. Even though it is not to the magnitude of your trials at this time in your life...I am glad I am not alone in my thoughts during the tough times!
I think that enduring it well means being willing to accept the Lord's will. I don't think it means we have to be super happy about the outcome, we're not built that way we still have to go through all the human emotions (sad, angry, frustrated, exhausted, wanting to give up at times etc..) . If we don't I think we're lying to ourselves. I do agree with what Colette said got there but don't stay there long. Find a way to serve someone or bring yourself back to all the good things in your life to. I hope you know that your not alone in these feelings even though our situations are different. I love you and you are always welcome to call me at 1 am to get distracted or we can cry together either way!!! LOVE YOU MUCH
I don't know, but I love ya!
Ok... Enduring is a matter of FAITH! Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, Faith in a God in Heaven who loves us, and cries with us. Faith in prayers, Faith in things we don't understand but KNOW that God has the perfect plan. When Fear creeps in, we lose the peace, when Fear creeps in....PRAY with all of your heart and soul! Peace will come back. YOu are enduring well sis, you amaze me! I so love you. Love, Mom
Oh boy, it is amazing to me that what you just posted is exactly how I've been feeling lately although our trails are different in so many ways they are the same. You have already been given great advice and I can't think of anything else to add except one thing! Never give up! The Savior ENDURED EVERYTHING! And with His help we CAN as well!
I hope that helps and don't hold feelings in share them and continue to communicate those feelings and work through them so 10 or 15 years down the road you don't have to deal with them all over again.
Thanks again for sharing and allowing me to be one of those who get to read your blog! You and your family are AMAZING!
Grammy said it. Faith!
Hang in there. Cry when you need to. It's okay.
But don't lose your Faith!
You are striving to turn to the Lord daily and rely on his strength. That, to me, is the definition of enduring it well.
I don't think I can say anything that hasn't already been said better than I could have worded it. Days are easy nights are hard, when the peace and quiet come, and distractions go away. Have you tried any herbal remedies to help at night? I'm just wondering if there is one that might help you feel calm, and go to sleep easier. On top of everything else, you definitely need your sleep!
Hey Friend,
It was so good to hear from you this weekend. I have thought about you alot and am grateful for your unconditional love. I have set up a blog and will send you an email and invite.
I love you friend.
crystal
Wow Kristen. I loved all the advice that you were given. I would have to say I agree with what everyone said. Keep your head held high and allow yourself to go through all the emotions. It is only natural. You have amazing friends and family that love you!! I love you. Let's get together soon.
I don't have much to say, but to agree with those before about faith. Reading this made me wonder if "keeping the faith" is "Enduring it well." Don't get me wrong, you can cry and scream and throw things. You can be mad and hurt and yell, but at the end of the day when you are in pain whether it be emotional, physical, or spiritual, if you are turning to the Lord, then you are enduring it well.... My thoughts are with you....
I don't think the Lord expects us to be "happy" about everything that happens to us. I think part of enduring it well is knowing that somewhere, sometime down the road you'll have learned something you wouldn't have otherwise learned and be more Christ-like because of it. I think another part is understanding that life will suck, then it will start to suck less, until one day you'll be able to look back and realize that what happened to you is just part of your life, maybe a big part, but just a part, and not your whole life. The Lord will never give us more than we can handle and even though it's hard to remember that sometimes, it's good to repeat it every once in a while (when you're feeling particularly overwhelmed) and know that He will help lift you up when life gets to be too much to bear. You won't heal from these struggles right away, and some days it'll feel like you never will, but I promise you that you will. Every day you'll hurt less and less and you won't feel so burdened. It might be microscopic but it will happen. Just by recognizing that you need to endure it well is one HUGE step in becoming more humble and Christ-like, and our Heavenly Father will smile down on you for recognizing that. As everyone has said, be angry, be upset, cry, let your heart be broken. That's part of our mortal existence. Why else would the Atonement be so important for us to survive this life with our spirits in tact? The Savior didn't just die to help us repent, He died so that we could be comforted. My favorite scripture is Isaiah 53:3-5 -
3 He is despised and rejected of men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief: and we hid as it were our faces from him; he was despised, and we esteemed him not.
4 Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.
5 But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.
He is a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief. He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows, and with His stripes we are healed. What beautiful and hopeful words! Our Savior, who loved us more than we can ever possibly know, has already suffered for us, so that our sorrow and struggles will be less than they could be. Anyway..... Sorry this is a novel but I wanted to let you know some of my thoughts on this subject. I love you to bits!
When I have those moments, when it feels like everything is crashing down and it is hard to even breath or my mind is shuffling thoughts so fast I'm sure I must be crazy, I think- am I bitter or getting better at this?
Can I just say you are doing a great job!
Trials do strengthen us, but first they break us down and when we are down the Lord extends tender mercies. Mercies we often do not realize until the storm has passed
and we know we made it through without turning away from the good and the love that is in our life.
May peace be with you- love you dearie!
Kristen, bless your heart! I can only imagine the heartache and anxiety your feel right now, but know that we all wish we could do more to help you endure this hard time. I really believe that just the mere fact that you want to understand and know if you are "enduring well" means that you are. Your heart is with the Lord, and your desire to serve and endure is sincere. Also, know that night time can be the hardest, lonliest time in one's life. "It's darkest before the dawn," is a true statement. Those who struggle with anxiety struggle the most during these hours. It is during our extremities, that we truly come to know our Savior and feel His peace, which surpasses our own understanding. I love the story of Elisha when the Lord opens the eyes of his servant and there are chariots of fire surrounding the Syrians. Remember, "they that be with us, are more than they that be with them." There are loved ones watching your little family and helping in ways that you cannot see but will come to understand in the Lord's own time. We love you Kristen and Josh. We pray for you and your beautiful family.
Love,Uncle Cal and Aunt Wendy
punching bags are good :) i say this, because it's how i cope when i'm overwhelmed. i imagine myself hitting a punching bag (because we don't have one.)
I know that Heavenly Father realizes we have times of sorrow and even anger about our trials.
so when you need to . . . get it out - allow yourself to yell, scream, cry, hit a punching bag. but then get down on your knees and ask Him to help you keep the faith and perspective He knows you are capable of having. YOU amaze me Kristen. I love you beyond words!
shan
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